Finding Sam: A JaSam Oneshot
by Jeniel0303
Summary: Sam's life is turned upside down by the reveal that her husband is not who she thought he was, and the husband she'd lost five years earlier was back. Now she has to figure out who she belongs with, but first, she has to figure out who she is. A Jasam fanfic, with a little bit of Dream. *Adult Content*


When they first announced SBu's return, I was beyond excited. While I've absolutely adored NuJasam, nothing can ever top OGJasam for me. I've never cared about his mob life, and actually found it added excitement and drama. Which is what I watch soaps for. Even so, I've found myself rooting for both couples at one point or another until finally moving firmly into the Jasam camp. But the one thing I've been frustrated with long before SBu's return, was Sam's new zen persona. Someone who was once a fiesty, fiercely independent, kickass woman became a quiet doormat. People who hurt her were quickly forgiven with barely a peep out of her. She became more of a support for her man, the keeper of his dreams rather than her own. So when I was taking one shot requests and someone joked that the couple they most wanted to see was Sam and her spine, I laughed. But then I thought, you know what? Me too! And so this is my version of the reveal, but with a twist. This story isn't just about which man Sam will choose, although in my head I know who she'll pick, but also about Sam finding herself again. I hope you enjoy it! Happy Reading and please, leave a review and let me know what you thought!

Jen

buttercup0303

* * *

The brisk winter's cold went unnoticed even as it reddened Samantha Morgan's cheeks and nose. Her body was trembling, but it wasn't from the cold.

"Are you okay?"

Sam turned around from where she stood, looking out over the quiet waters of the Port Charles Harbor. She met Carly's eyes and shook her head.

"I just got confirmation that I've been married to a stranger who thought he was my husband, while my real husband just came back from the dead. Add to that, I now have children by two brothers. I'm basically Elizabeth, except worse because she only _thought_ she was having Nikolas' baby. I actually had a child with my husband's brother. So no, not okay, Carly." Sam let out a somewhat hysterical laugh and sucked in a deep breath after her rant.

Carly's mouth turned down in sympathy and she reached out to pull Sam into a hug. Sam clung to her, desperately needing to feel something real, and shockingly, Carly's friendship felt like one of the few things she could count on right now.

Carly pulled back and held her at arm's length.

"First of all, _no one's_ worse than Elizabeth." Carly joked, smirking when a small smile tugged at Sam's lips. She frowned studying her friend's face. "You know, when Andre made his announcement, you turning around and running out of the PCPD like a bat out of hell wasn't exactly the reaction I expected." Carly said wryly.

Sam looked away in shame. That hadn't been her best moment, but God. How was she supposed to deal with all these emotions rolling around inside of her right now? She was married to a man she was very much in love with, but that love was built on the firm, unbreakable foundation she had built with another man.

How could she look at Drew knowing she was questioning every moment of their relationship? How could she meet Jason's eyes knowing she'd given her heart and her body to his twin brother, believing him to be Jason? She had noticed differences, of course. But not enough to realize the man she was falling in love with wasn't her husband.

His personality was different, but not in the ways that mattered. He was still loyal and loving and kind. But his priorities had changed, the things he'd wanted out of life had changed. She had just chalked that up to the memory loss causing him to form new personality traits, and the experiences he'd gone through making him want a change. Even their lovemaking had been different. No less intense, but not the same, somehow. Again, she'd chalked that up to time and the accident. Overall, there had never been a doubt in her mind that she had been reunited with her soulmate, Jason Morgan.

And how could she live with that? She hadn't even recognized her own soulmate. Well, that wasn't exactly true, though, was it? Because the minute she had opened her eyes in the hospital and they had locked with Jason's? She'd known without a single solitary doubt that she was looking at the Jason Morgan who went into this very harbor five years ago. A man she had been very much in love with when he disappeared.

And yet, that didn't erase the past two years she'd spent with Andrew Cain. Yes, her love for him grew out of the love she had for Jason. But their experiences, their memories, their love? That was something _they_ had created. No one could take that away from them. Nevertheless, it felt tainted now.

"Sam?"

Sam was jolted out of her musings by Carly's worried voice.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"I asked what you were going to do? How are you going to explain to Drew that Jason is the man you were meant to spend your life with?"

Sam looked at her in surprise.

"I'm not."

Carly frowned.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I'm not going to tell Jason- I mean, _Drew_ that. I don't even know how I feel about all of this, Carly. I'm not ready to make any kind of decision." Sam said with a shake of her head. Carly stared at her in disbelief.

"Sam, it's _Jason._ He's finally back and he's still your husband."

"And so is Drew." Sam replied wearily.

"Actually, no, he's not. Your marriage isn't legally binding because he's not Jason. You're still married to Jason." Carly shot back, unable to believe what she was hearing.

"I mean, I don't get it, Sam. All you've wanted all these years was to have Jason back. And you finally do. So why aren't you running into his arms right now?"

"Don't you think I want to?!" Sam finally exploded, rounding on Carly.

"For five years, I've longed to see his face again, hear his voice, feel his arms wrapped around me again. I've ached for him. And now he's here, close enough to touch, but I can't."

Carly's face softened at the torment so clearly written on Sam's features.

"Why can't you?"

"Because I love my husband. I love Drew. No matter what's happened, Jason coming back doesn't change the fact that I fell in love with Drew."

"Yeah, because you thought he was Jason."

"Yes, I thought he was Jason! But he's not. And that love is still there. Those feelings don't just go away because Jason is back. We love each other. And it's just as powerful as what I feel for Jason. Don't you see, Carly? My heart is being ripped in two. I don't want to hurt anyone, but that's exactly what's going to happen. No matter who I choose, someone is going to be hurt."

"But what do _you_ want?"

"I don't know." Sam sighed, rubbing her hands with her face. "Or maybe that's not completely true. My heart is pulling me down two different paths but I'm not ready to go down either of them just yet. I don't know what to do or how I should feel. All I know is, there's two men out there who have loved me and risked their lives for me, have fathered my children, and I love them both. But there's only one of them whose face keeps flashing in my mind right now and the guilt over that is tearing me apart!" Sam swiped at the tears that spilled down her cheeks.

Carly nodded in compassion. But she couldn't stop herself from asking.

"Is it guilt because you fell in love with someone other than Jason? Or guilt because you know that even though you did, your heart is still with Jason and always will be?"

Sam let out a choked sob. A sudden tingle ran up her spine, making Sam spin around, her eyes locking with Jason's brilliant blue eyes. Tears immediately filled her eyes, and her body began to tremble with the force of the emotions that suddenly rocketed through her. He stood at the end of the pier, uncertain for a moment.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. I'll go." Jason took a couple of steps backwards, his eyes drinking in the sight of Sam. Those two steps away from her were the hardest two steps he'd ever taken. But he could see in her eyes that she was torn. She loved his brother now. And as much as that tore him apart, he wouldn't add to the pain he knew she was feeling.

Sam stared at Jason, her eyes running over him, memorizing the features she'd thought she'd only ever see again in pictures. And as she watched him back away from her, something inside of her literally ached. She shoved aside the feelings of guilt swamping her, unable to focus on anything but the sudden desperation she was feeling. She couldn't let him walk away again. She'd spent the past two weeks pushing him away, ignoring her feelings and worse, ignoring _his_ feelings. She couldn't let him leave without knowing how she really felt.

"Jason."

Jason froze, his eyes never leaving Sam's beautiful brown ones. He wanted to stride over to her and yank her into his arms. He'd dreamt of feeling her body against his, the memory of how perfectly she'd fit in his arms giving him the strength needed to fight the hold of the drugs they'd pumped into him at that Russian clinic. But he didn't move. He steeled himself against his instincts and waited for her to make the first move.

Carly looked between them and though she wanted to stay, she made herself leave. Although, the way they were looking at each other, she didn't think they would even notice her absence.

Sam stared at him, suddenly at a loss for words.

"It's okay, Sam. Whatever you have to say, just say."

"I can't." She whispered. She turned to leave.

Jason looked frustrated.

"Why won't you talk to me? Just talk to me!" He pleaded angrily.

"Why don't you hate me? How can you even look at me?" She suddenly cried out, whipping towards him.

Jason stared at her, shocked at her outburst.

"I-I don't-What do you mean?" He stammered at a loss.

"I thought another man was you. I married someone thinking he was you. I made love to someone thinking he was you. I had his child. I fell in love with him."

Jason felt each word like a lash on his heart.

"Stop! Just stop!" He cried out hoarsely, unable to bear to listen to her.

"I can't!" She screamed, tears streaming down her face, a face twisted in torment.

"How could I not have known? I knew you better than anyone. You were supposed to be my soulmate. How could I believe he was you?"

And it was as if a dam had broken.

"I'm sorry, Jason. I'm so sorry. I should have known he wasn't you. I never should have stopped looking for you. You lost five years of your life, of _our_ life and I've been cold and cruel and unfeeling towards you. I'm sorry." She sobbed, covering her face with her hands.

Jason strode forward and closed the distance between them in three steps. He reached up and gently pulled her hands away from her face. Using his thumb and forefinger, he tilted her chin up to him.

"Sam, stop. You were in shock. None of this is your fault. None of it."

She just cried harder, knocking his hands off her face.

"Just stop! Stop being so calm and understanding! You came home expecting to find your wife and son waiting for you and instead you found out I fell in love with and married your brother and had his child!" Jason blanched as her words hit him like a battering ram.

"And you've been nothing but patient and kind and understanding. And I've been awful. I should have told you sooner. Jason, I'm so sorry for everything you've been through, everything you've lost." She clasped her hands in front of her and took a step closer.

"But Jason, I'm also happy. I am _so_ happy that you're alive and that you're back. I missed you, I _loved_ you every day since you disappeared. When I met Drew, we were just friends. I never suspected he was you until Carly brought me the DNA results and Spinelli's facial recognition program. Even then, it took a while for us to fall back in love and rebuild a life together. And it's a good life. I'm happy, Jason. But with you...the minute I opened my eyes in that hospital room, and my eyes met yours? I knew. I knew right here, Jason." Sam pounded her fist against her chest, struggling to choke out the words over her tears as she stared up into his eyes. "And when you put your hands on mine, I was sure. I would know you anywhere, Jason."

Jason stared at her with eyes brimming with tears as his body was suddenly suffused with the warmth her words caused. He knew things between them were far from settled, but her words were like a balm to the open, bleeding wounds he'd sustained to his heart from the moment he'd realized she had remarried.

"From the moment I was able to fight off the effects of the drugs, I've dreamt of coming home to you and Danny. I just wanted to hold you both in my arms again. It's the only thing that kept me going."

Sam let out a broken sob at his words.

"Oh God." She cried, shaking her head, confusion, relief, guilt, and an overwhelming love fighting for dominance within her.

"Jason." She choked out before closing the distance between them and throwing her arms around him. Without hesitation, Jason's arms folded around her as he clung tightly to her, taking his first real breath since arriving into Port Charles. He'd been back for weeks but it wasn't until this very moment that he felt like he was home.

"Sam. God, I missed you. You have to know that I love you. Forever." Jason whispered roughly, swallowing the lump in his throat, blinking away the tears that burned his eyes. Sam's eyes slipped closed in pain even as she had to swallow back the words that rose automatically to her throat. She forced herself to pull away, taking a step back.

"I can't. I can't do this." She cried, gesturing between them. Jason looked devastated but a sound had him going alert, his head snapping up, locking on something behind Sam.

"I'm sorry, Jason. I want to but I can't-."

"Sam." Jason cut her off, jerking his head towards her. She stared at him in confusion before slowly following his eyes. She gasped in dismay as her eyes locked with Drew's. The betrayal and pain in his eyes was like a thousand tiny daggers in her heart, and she was suffused with guilt.

Drew turned on his heel and strode away without a word, leaving Sam staring after him, heartbroken. She couldn't let him walk away without explaining.

She started to run after him but stopped in her tracks, looking back at Jason guiltily. She couldn't take this. No matter what she did, she felt immeasurable guilt.

"It's okay. Go. You know how to find me." Jason reassured, even though he knew watching her chase after _him_ would destroy him. And it did. After a brief look of regret, Sam spun around and ran after Drew.

Jason turned and walked a few steps to the stairs and slammed his fist into the wooden beam on the landing over and over again, roaring his pain. When he finally stopped, his knuckles were a raw, bloody mess. Breathing heavily, Jason placed his uninjured palm against the beam as he leaned forward, his head down. A single tear slid down his face, hovered at the edge of his chin, before splashing on the ground at his feet.

"Drew, wait! Please!"

Drew whirled around so fast that Sam stumbled to a stop. His hand came up automatically to steady her but he would have dropped her arm if she hadn't grabbed it with her other hand and tugged.

"Thank you for always being there to catch me." She said softly. Drew raised pained eyes to her.

"How could you?" He asked in a low voice.

Sam shook her head helplessly.

"I'm sorry."

"That's not good enough." He snapped. "For weeks, you've been reassuring me, promising me nothing would change, that we were solid. Then I find you in _his_ arms? How could you do that to me?"

Now anger warred with the guilt she'd been drowning in for weeks.

"Do you really have to ask? Why can't you try to understand what this is like for me?"

Drew scoffed.

"For you? Sam, everything I thought I knew about myself is a lie. It's all been stripped away from me and I'm left with nothing but another man's memories. How could you be comforting him right now?"

Sam shook her head, struggling to bite back the frustration that threatened to leak through.

"You're left with nothing but another man's memories? What about Jason, then? You know, your brother? He has his memories, but you have everything else. You have his wife and child, his home, his entire life. Can't you muster up some compassion for him?"

Drew stared at her, his face leeching of color.

"His wife and son? Just like that I'm not your husband anymore? I'm not Danny's father?"

Sam winced. She stepped forward and grabbed his hand.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. You're the only father Danny has ever known. And you _are_ my husband. And I love you very much. Please tell me you know that." She cupped his face and stared into his eyes, searching for the man she loved.

This angry, antagonistic man he's morphed into since Jason had surfaced was such a departure from the loving, carefree man she'd fallen in love with. She was worried about him but she was finding his constant need for reassurance draining. Finally, she saw his eyes soften and breathed a sigh of relief as she finally recognized her husband.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Sam. I'm being an ass. I'm just in shock and it feels like the ground just opened up underneath me and I'm taking it out on you. I'm sorry. I love you so damn much and I love our family and I've been so scared that I'm going to lose you both."

He pulled her into his arms for a crushing hug, but Sam held on just as tight. In his arms she could always find comfort. He was her home.

He pulled back slightly and lowered his head to hers. And before she knew what she was doing she was pulling out of his arms and stumbling back.

"I can't." She said miserably, watching as Drew's face crumbled.

"I knew it. I've lost you, haven't I?"

Tears welled and spilled down Sam's cheeks as she heard the pain in Drew's voice, the devastation in his eyes.

"No! I mean, I-I don't know. Drew, I love you. That hasn't changed. But I won't lie to you. Things are different."

"Because of _him_." He spat bitterly.

Sam nodded miserably.

"Yes. With Jason's return, things aren't as clear as they were. I need time, Drew. To figure out what happened and how I feel. Can you give me that?"

Drew appeared to struggle to swallow back his frustration but nodded gruffly.

"I don't want to confuse things for you anymore than they already are. We can talk to Danny together later. For now, I'm going to stay at Monica's. At least she hasn't turned her back on me." He said bitterly.

Sam flinched.

"I haven't either, Drew. I still love you."

"But you love him too."

"Yes. I love him too." Her answer was swift, without hesitation and she could see that hurt him. She wished for a moment she had lied, but knew she wouldn't be doing anyone any favors if she did.

"You said the life I gave you was the one you always wanted. Aurora, me out of the mob. He'll never give you that. You know that." He said quietly.

Sam hesitated, and again, found she couldn't lie.

"Back then...when I was with him...I never needed Aurora. I never needed him to leave the mob. I just needed him."

Drew nodded shortly, bracing himself.

"And now, with me?"

"With you it was different. That lifestyle was never yours, you know? It never quite fit. And so it terrified me that you were going to lose your life trying to make it fit. When you quit working for Sonny, and bought Aurora, it was a relief. It was never the life I imagined for myself, but with you, I could be happy."

Drew took that in, swallowing thickly.

"I'm not giving up on my family. On our marriage." He declared suddenly. Sam smiled weakly at him.

"Good."

With one last lingering look, Sam turned and walked away.

* * *

Sam stared at the new nameplate on the door of her office.

 _Samantha Cain_

"News travels fast." She muttered dryly, ignoring the niggle of discomfort in the pit of her stomach. She pushed open the door to her office and slid into the chair behind her desk. She took a deep breath and then just looked around. She missed her small but efficient office. She felt out of place. Almost like she was wearing a suit that didn't quite fit. But she wanted it to. Or...at least...she _thought_ she did.

"You look good behind that desk."

Sam glanced up to see her mother, Alexis, standing in the doorway. She stood up and rounded her desk and walked into her mother's open arms.

"You heard." Sam whispered.

"Monica called me after Jason- well, no, that's Drew now, isn't it? Anyways, Drew called her and she called me. She wanted to see how you were holding up. But I couldn't tell her since I didn't know." Alexis said chastisingly.

"Honey, why didn't you call me?"

Sam pulled out of Alexis' arms and back into her chair.

"Because I need to figure out how I feel."

Alexis arched a brow.

"Sweetheart, I know you loved Jason when he passed away. But honey, that was five years ago. And that was before Drew. Drew, who has literally stepped in front of a bullet for you. Drew who gave you that beautiful daughter of yours. Who _saved_ that beautiful daughter of yours. Who-."

"Mom, stop. Please. You don't have to tell me what Drew has done for me. Believe me, I know. He is amazing and I love him very much." Sam pinched the bridge of her nose as a headache formed behind her eyes.

Alexis sighed, relaxing a little in her chair.

"Thank goodness. You know, a part of me was more than a little terrified you would let nostalgia send you running into Jason's arms. But a larger part of me knew you were too smart for that, and too good of a mother."

Sam stared at Alexis in disbelief.

"So we're back to that already? Jason is a criminal, too dangerous to love, and if I went back to him, it means I'm not a good mother, I'm not smart enough to know better?" Sam spat in insult.

Alexis looked alarmed and circled her hands as she searched for words.

"No, of course not. I'm just saying you've grown beyond Jason and into a mother."

Sam's eyes narrowed.

"I was a mother when I went home with Jason that night to start over. And to be very clear, you were perfectly fine with me loving and being married to Jason just a couple of weeks ago. You're acting like I moved on from Jason. But I didn't. I married the man I thought was Jason. And loving Jason doesn't make me any less of a good mother."

"Sweetheart, I didn't mean-."

"You know, I can't believe you. How dare you come into my office and judge me when you are still in love with my father? He isn't just in the mob, he HEADS the mob. Added to that, he abused you and tried to kill you, and yet you have every excuse in the world when it comes to Julian. Why doesn't Jason get the same pass?" Sam railed at her mother, more frustrated than she could express.

"Because I'm your mother and I want you to do what I'm not strong enough to do!" Alexis yelled back.

"You can't compare Jason and Julian! The only thing they have in common is their connection to the mob. Otherwise, they are _nothing_ alike. Jason is loyal, and kind, and he would _never_ hurt me the way Julian hurt you."

Alexis stared at Sam and let out a sad breath.

"It sounds like you already know who you want to be with."

Sam looked at her in shock.

"No. No, I'm not, I mean, I haven't made any decisions yet. I just take offense to you, of all people, judging Jason."

Alexis had to hide the hurt that caused. After all, her daughter had a point.

Sam closed her eyes in regret.

"Mom, I'm sorry. I just, I can't deal with anyone telling me who they think I need to be with. I have to figure this out on my own."

Alexis nodded and gave Sam a soft smile.

"Okay, you got it. But just let me say one last thing-."

"Mom." Sam groaned.

"I know, but I'm your Mom, so you have to listen. You have been the happiest I've ever seen you these last few years. And that's largely because of Drew. I'd hate to see you throw that away because of some mistaken sense of loyalty to a man you loved and lost five years ago."

When Sam didn't respond, Alexis lifted her hands in surrender, walked over and kissed her daughter on the cheek, before making her exit.

Sam stared at the closed door before lowering her hands into her face.

"Mrs. Cain? Mrs. Cain? Ahem, excuse, Mrs. Morgan?" At last, Sam looked up to see her assistant staring at her askance.

"Sorry, Cheryl. Not used to...anyway. What can I do for you?"

"I have the reports you asked for." She held a stack of folders out to Sam. Sam stared at them, asking herself what she was doing. She didn't know the first thing about running a media company. And she didn't care.

"What am I doing? I don't belong here." She said to herself, standing slowly. She moved to grab her jacket, only now realizing she'd left the blazer on the hanger in her closet and had grabbed her leather jacket instead. With a slight smile, she pulled it on, feeling it settle around her like a second skin while simultaneously she felt a weight lift off her shoulders.

"That didn't take long."

Sam looked up and the smile slid off her face as she met Drew's angry, disappointed eyes. Cheryl looked between them curiously, before skittering out of the office.

"Drew-."

"Jason's back five minutes and you're already slipping on your leather jacket. What's next, jumping on the back of a motorcycle?"

Sam raised a brow, feeling defensive.

"And what's wrong with that? This is the jacket _you_ gave me. And if I want to ride the motorcycle, what's wrong with that? We went riding two weeks ago. All of a sudden there's something wrong with that?"

Drew ran a hand through his short hair.

"It depends on who's in front of you on that bike. Is it me or my brother?" He sneered the last word, as if disgusted with it.

Sam sighed, frustrated and more than a little offended.

"No one's in front of me. I can ride on my own, I don't need either one of you. Everyone seems to forget that I had a successful private investigation firm. I had a steady list of clients that I worked for regularly and who still call me, even though I took a hiatus. I can reopen my doors any time I want and I'd be just fine. I don't need Jason's mob money or your media company." She snapped.

Drew reared back.

"My media company? I thought this was our company? Our dream?"

"Ours? Drew, you didn't even ask me if I wanted to own a media company. You just bought it. And that's okay. I didn't mind because I love you and if this was your new dream, then I was happy to be a part of it. But it doesn't fit, Drew. It's not who I am." There. She'd finally said it. She'd felt stifled, trapped in this new company. But she hadn't wanted to hurt her husband, and so she'd thrown herself into it. But her dream had been her PI firm. Not Aurora.

"What about me? Our life, our marriage, our family? Do we not fit anymore?"

Sam sighed, covering her face with her hands.

"Drew, I can't keep having the same conversation with you. I'm sorry, I can't. I love you. I love our life, I love our family. Of course we still fit. But I don't want this company. I want my PI firm. That doesn't mean I don't want us."

Drew's face brightened as he rushed forward and pulled her into his arms.

"Baby, you won't regret choosing me. We-."

Sam's eyes widened as she realized her mistake.

"Drew, stop. Please, I'm sorry."

Drew let her down slowly, his eyes shuttering as he read her features.

"That's not what you meant." It wasn't a question.

Sam closed her eyes briefly.

"I just meant that me not wanting to work for Aurora has nothing to do with Jason coming back. It's about me and what I want. I love you, Drew. I do. But I still don't know what I'm going to do."

He nodded and backed away from her. She felt his loss instantly, but knew this was best for her. She needed to be sure and right now, her heart yearned for two separate men.

With an apologetic look, Sam left the offices of Aurora Media with no plans to return as one of the owners.

Drew watched her go, his heart breaking. Just two months ago, their future had never looked brighter, and he had never been happier. Now he felt like he was losing everything. But the worst loss would be Sam. He loved her more than anything in this world. He couldn't imagine his life without her. But it seemed she was having trouble imagining it with him. She definitely couldn't see herself at Aurora.

He understood. Some part of him had seen that she wasn't as into the company as he was, but he had hoped with time she would see what he saw. Their future. But he could deal with losing her as a business partner. He didn't know if he could lose her as a partner in life.

With a heavy sigh, Drew rubbed at the ache in his chest absently, swallowing the lump in his throat.

* * *

"Mom, please. Just make the call, okay?" Sam sighed, waiting for her mother's response before hanging up. Now that she'd finally admitted to herself what she wanted, she didn't want to waste anymore time. She had her mother working on renewing her PI license, and she'd never sold her office, so she was headed there to start cleaning it up now.

Spinelli had leapt at the idea of reopening McCall and Jackal. He could handle his part of the business from anywhere, so he was all in. Sam had already put out some feelers and gotten very positive responses from her old regulars. Background checks and insurance fraud investigations weren't exactly thrilling stuff, but they were nice, steady income that let her take on the more interesting cases as they came around. Beaming, she tilted her face up to the sky. She had been so happy these past couple of years, but until now, she hadn't realized how unfulfilled she'd felt professionally.

"What a beautiful day." She said out loud to herself.

"Yeah. Beautiful."

Sam gasped and she turned to meet Jason's admiring gaze. She could feel her cheeks heat up and smiled at him in greeting.

"Sorry, I didn't know you'd be here." He apologized.

Sam tilted her head.

"Why do you always apologize when you see me? You don't have to be sorry for running into me. It's a small town. We're all going to have to get used to seeing each other around."

Jason shoved his hands in his jeans pockets and lifted his shoulders.

"Because whenever you see me, your shoulders get tense. It's like seeing me hurts you. And that's the last thing I would ever want to do."

Sam stared at him and before she could stop herself, she was talking.

"What _do_ you want? You haven't said anything or asked me for anything. Drew is fighting like hell to keep me. Why aren't you?"

Jason stared at her in surprise.

"Do you want me to?" He asked, infuriatingly. Sam rolled her eyes.

"Does that matter? I asked what _you_ want, Jason. I don't need anyone to fight for me. But this passive, whatever happens happens thing you have going on? It doesn't do you any favors." She snapped, before turning to walk away.

But before she made it three steps, Jason had jogged over and turned her back to face him.

"I'm trying not to hurt you and I can see that this does. You asked me what I want? You. I want you. I want you and Danny and me to be a family, the way we planned to. I want you to love me the way that I love you. Because I do. I love you so much it hurts. And if you were to choose me? I would drop down on my knees and thank God."

Tears blurred Sam's eyes at Jason's sudden declaration. Speechless, she just stared at him.

He cleared his throat and let her go, shoving his hands back in his pockets and stepping back.

"But it's not up to me. It's up to you. You said you need time. I'm trying to give it to you. I can wait for you, Sam. I've been waiting five years. I'd wait forever." With a small nod, and a gentle smile, Jason backed away and disappeared around the corner.

Breathless, Sam stared after him. She placed a hand against her racing heart and replayed the last moments in her mind. And then she simply covered her face with her hands and cried.

* * *

The sound of the door knocking echoed through the penthouse, sending nerves jangling in Sam's stomach. She glanced over at where Danny sat on the floor, playing with toy cars and took a deep breath.

The door swung open and revealed Jason, standing there nervously. He drank in Sam's face for a moment, before his eyes were pulled towards Danny. His son.

Sam watched Jason stare at Danny as if looking at a miracle and had to catch her breath.

"Thanks for coming, Jason. And for waiting for me to be ready. Come in."

Jason nodded, smiling softly as he took a few steps inside and stopped. He seemed hesitant to come in further and Sam realized with a shock that he was nervous. The unflinching, unshakable Jason Morgan was actually nervous about telling Danny he was his father.

He cleared his throat and glanced at Sam.

"Is, uh, is Drew going to be here too?" He asked, ignoring the piercing pain the thought of Drew and Sam being together brought.

Sam looked away.

"He's upstairs with Scout."

"I'm here." Drew said, roughly, standing at the top of the landing.

Sam looked between the two men and took the cowards way out, moving over to Danny. She led him over to the couch, seating him on one end, while she sat in the middle. Drew took the seat to her left, which left Jason to sit in the armchair to the side, closer to Danny.

"Hi." Danny said sweetly, smiling over at Jason. Jason smiled tremulously, blinking against the tears in his eyes.

"Hi buddy."

"I remember you. You're my Mommy's friend. The one she said was someone special."

Jason nodded, while Sam could feel Drew stiffen beside her. She closed her eyes briefly, before letting out a puff of air. She would deal with that later.

"That's right, baby." Sam started, turning her body towards him.

"I wanted you to meet him again. You see, a little while ago, we found out something pretty big, and Mommy needed a little time to adjust."

Danny turned towards her, all ears.

"You see, this man here and your dad, are brothers. But they didn't know because some bad people kept them apart."

Danny interrupted eagerly, turning to Jason.

"So if you're my daddy's brother, does that mean you're my uncle?" He asked excitedly.

Jason froze, not sure how to answer. Drew felt warmth tingle through him as Danny called him daddy, as well as unbearable sadness that it may very well be the last time he called him that.

"Not exactly." Sam hesitated. "Do you remember when we first met your daddy in the hospital? He had bandages around his face because of an accident, and he couldn't remember who he was?"

Danny nodded.

"Yeah. You told me that's why we didn't know he was my daddy at first. Because he looked different."

Sam smiled and nodded.

"That's right, sweetie. But see, because of the accident, we made a mistake. We thought that he was Jason Morgan, but really, he's not. His name is Drew Cain. He's Jason Morgan's twin brother."

Danny's brow furrowed.

"But I thought you said my daddy's name was Jason Morgan?"

Sam blinked back tears and nodded.

"It is." She had to stop and swallow the tears that wanted to rise up. Drew cleared his throat and took over.

"You see, buddy, I thought I was Jason Morgan. But I'm not. That means I'm not your dad, after all. I'm your uncle." Drew's voice cracked at the end, betraying the pain this was causing him. Sam unconsciously reached out to hold his hand, squeezing in comfort.

Danny's eyes filled with tears.

"But I love you. You're my daddy."

Drew let out a choked sob, clearing his throat roughly so he could speak.

"I know, son. But I still love you like a son. I will always be your father in my heart."

Danny's lower lip trembled and Sam let go of Drew's hand to curve around her son protectively, offering him comfort.

"Danny, my special friend? That's the real Jason Morgan. He's your dad." She whispered, looking at Jason through damp lashes.

Danny stood up slowly.

"You're my real daddy?" He asked in a shaky voice, not hearing the harsh breath Drew let out.

Jason nodded shakily.

"Yeah. Yeah, I am."

Danny was quiet a moment.

"Where have you been?"

Jason froze, trying to choose his words carefully.

"Those bad men that kept me away from my brother? They also kept me away from you and your mom. I didn't want to leave you and I fought really, really hard to get back to you and your mom."

Danny nodded thoughtfully.

"I know you don't know me, but I already love you so much. And I'd really like to get to know you, when you're ready." Jason said, his voice shaking.

Danny smiled widely.

"I'm ready now, Daddy."

Jason sucked in a breath, shocked, his eyes going to Sam, who was staring between him and Danny, a hand against her heart, tears spilling down her cheeks. He looked back at his son, his heart overflowing with love and gratitude.

"Okay. So do you think you're ready to give your dad a hug?"

Danny didn't hesitate, flying into his arms and holding him tightly. Jason wrapped his arms around his son for the first time since he was a baby, and closed his eyes, tears slipping down his face. He reached out a hand to Sam unconsciously. Sam smiled tenderly, and gripped it in her own without hesitation.

Drew stared at them, his heart shattered as for the first time since falling in love with Sam, he felt like an outsider in the penthouse. He slipped away, unnoticed, climbing the stairs. He moved like a zombie, making his way to Emily Scout's room. She beamed up at him from her crib and he scooped her up into his arms, letting out a shaky breath of relief.

"No matter what happens, I'm your daddy, Scout. And no one can ever take that away from me." He sank into the rocking chair, rocking back and forth slowly, letting the love for his daughter soothe him as he mourned the loss of the little boy he'd thought was his own.

* * *

"Danny! Put that down!" Sam hollered from the kitchen, holding a squirming and crying Scout in her arms. She blinked back the tears that threatened as a feeling of being completely overwhelmed swept through her. It had only been a couple of weeks since Drew moved out and Sam was starting to realize how much she had depended on him.

Danny was acting out more and more, missing Drew. Scout cried for him, and Sam felt like she was failing her children. All because she couldn't decide who she loved. Was she being selfish by tearing apart her family?

A loud crash had her head snapping to the side. Danny stood beside the broken pieces of the lamp, having been trying to move it so he could play with his cards on the table.

"Danny!"

Danny looked up at her with eyes shimmering with tears.

"I'm sorry, Mommy."

Sam took a deep breath.

"It's okay, baby. Just don't move, okay? I don't want you to cut your foot. I'm going to set Scout down and then I'll come pick you up and move you, Okay?"

"Okay, Mommy."

Smiling at him, Sam turned and set Scout in her bassinet, making her cries ratchet up a few dials. Wincing, Sam tried to soothe her.

"It's okay, I'll be right back, baby girl." Sam started towards Danny. Just then, there was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it!" Danny shouted excitedly, leaping forward.

"Danny, no!" Sam called, trying to grab him to stop him from stepping on glass but he moved just out of her reach. She tripped on one of Danny's toys and fell forward onto her knees, landing hands first on the glass. She cried out in pain as she felt several shards of glass pierce the soft flesh of her hands.

"Hi, Daddy!" Danny shouted happily.

Jason was smiling at his son when he heard Sam cry out. He saw her fall and land in what looked like a pile of glass. Closing the door behind him, he rushed forward.

Sam glanced up at Danny's greeting, tossing back a wave of brown hair that had cascaded into her face. She stared at Jason in surprise.

"Jason."

He knelt beside her, and gently helped her to her feet. When he noticed her feet were bare, he scooped her up effortlessly and carried her to the couch, setting her down gently.

"Thank you." Sam whispered.

"Mommy, you're bleeding!" Danny said, a tinge of hysteria in his voice. He looked at the glass and seemed to realize he had caused this, and burst into tears.

As his cries merged with Scout's, Sam looked torn over who to comfort first.

"Let me help you. First aid still in the same place?"

"Yeah."

Jason moved quickly, while Sam tried to calm Danny. She wanted to gather her little boy in her arms, but she wasn't exactly in the best position to.

"Danny, stop crying. Your mom is going to be okay." Jason said gently, but firmly. It startled Danny, though, who quieted and stared at his dad with wide eyes. Jason scooped up Scout as he passed, patting her back and bouncing her gently. She immediately quieted, content.

Sam stared at him with gratitude and a little bit of awe.

"I forgot how good you are with kids."

Jason smiled at her. He set Scout into her swing, and set it to medium. Scout swung back and forth quietly, her eyes following Jason's every movement as if mesmerized. Sam knew the feeling. Jason reached over and lifted Danny up easily, sitting him on the armchair near Scout.

"I'm going to take a look at your mom's hands now. I need you to sit here until I'm done and I can clean up the glass."

"Am I in trouble?" Danny asked pitiably.

Jason smiled gentle, running a hand through his son's soft locks.

"No, buddy. I just don't want you to get hurt. That glass is really sharp."

Danny studied his dad, who seemed to understand and met his gaze evenly. Satisfied that he was telling the truth, Danny smiled sweetly and nodded.

"Okay, Daddy."

Jason turned to Sam, opening the first aid kit.

"It's okay, I can do it." Sam protested but stopped when Jason leveled an even look at her.

"Thank you." She conceded.

She watched as Jason picked up the tweezers and gently pulled the shards of glass from the palms of her hands. She winced in pain, but he was so careful, it didn't hurt as much as it could have. She did stiffen a bit as he cleaned her cuts with alcohol, but he quickly blew on her hand to lessen the burn.

Sam was helpless to react though, his cool breath sending shivers of desire up her spine. Jason seemed to sense her arousal because he froze, lifting his eyes to hers. Sparks flew between them as they stared at each other in silence.

Finally, Sam forced herself to look away. Jason let out a breath and after a moment, continued his ministrations. While he bandaged her hands, Sam focused on Danny to avoid the awkwardness that had just sprung up between her and Jason.

"Daniel Edward Morgan. How many times have I told you not to open the doors to strangers?" She asked sternly.

Danny sank in his chair.

"It wasn't a stranger. It was my Daddy!" He said winningly.

Unmoved, Sam leveled him with a look that said not to mess with his mother.

"You didn't know that when you opened the door, did you?"

"I felt it in my heart." He said convincingly. A choked back laugh from in front of her had Sam nudging Jason with her foot, even though she had to bite back a grin herself. Jason cleared his throat and wiped all hunt of humor from his expression as he looked at his son.

"Your Mom is right, Danny. That was a very dangerous thing to do. You have to be more careful, son. You're the most important thing in the world to us. We'd be devastated if something happened to you."

Under the guilt trip from both his parents, Danny slumped his shoulders and nodded.

"I'm sorry, Mommy. I won't do it again."

Her hands now carefully bandaged and wrapped by Jason, Sam opened her arms to Danny. Danny ran into them, and let his mother comfort him. She glanced over at Jason and mouthed thank you. He nodded and smiled.

Silently, he got up and started cleaning up the glass. While he did that, Sam stood up and after checking on a now dozing Scout, she went back to the kitchen to try and salvage dinner. But it was hopelessly burned.

"Not much has changed." Jason teased from the doorway.

Sam laughed.

"Actually, I cook now. Not a lot, but I usually don't burn things."

"Sure."

Sam laughed in mock outrage and threw a dishcloth at Jason, who caught it easily.

"You never did tell me why you stopped by."

"I was hoping to spend some time with Danny."

"It's almost his bedtime, Jason."

Jason shook his head.

"Sorry. I should've called first. I'm gonna go." He turned to leave.

Sam hesitated then took a step forward.

"Jason."

He stopped and turned back.

"If you'd like, you can stay for dinner and tuck Danny in for the night. I'm sure he'd love that."

"So would I." He replied with a small smile. "But maybe you should let me cook." He teased.

With a laugh, Sam waved him into the kitchen.

"I'm going to go feed Scout, and then put her down for the night."

Jason nodded, watching her leave with a smile. He hadn't planned on stopping by today, but after a long day of looking into his disappearance, Jason had longed to see Sam and Danny's faces. He knew he was supposed to stay away but it was like Sam had her own gravitational pull. He couldn't stay away for long.

Twenty minutes later, Jason had settled Danny down at the table with a plate of pasta and a small salad.

"Where's your mom?"

"She's putting Scout to bed. You can go get her." Danny said around a mouthful of food.

Jason hesitated, looking towards the stairs. For so long, this had been his home with Sam. But now it was her home with his brother. He wasn't sure he had the right to walk through it anymore.

Still, helplessly drawn to her, Jason sought out Sam. He froze when he found her in baby's room, sitting in the rocking chair, breastfeeding Scout. It was a beautiful moment, and Sam looked exactly the way he'd always imagined her looking. Except he'd never imagined that it would be another man's child at her breast. He shouldn't be here, he thought suddenly, feeling shattered. He started to back out but Sam sensed his presence. She looked up and stared at him in shock.

"I-I'm sorry. Um, I just, I mean...dinner's ready."

Sam calmly covered herself and stood, moving a sleeping Scout into her crib. She avoided his gaze. When she'd looked up, he had looked so heartbreakingly sad, she didn't know if she could bear to see that look again.

"I'll be right down."

Without another word, Jason escaped downstairs. His heart aching, he tried to shake off the sadness that was seeping over him. A few minutes later, Sam joined them and they ate quietly.

"Thank you, Jason. That was delicious." She said softly, gathering the dishes. When he moved to help she shook her head. "You cooked, I'll clean. Why don't you get Danny through his bedtime process?"

Danny beamed at him.

"Bath time!"

With a grin, Jason let his son lead him away.

An hour later, Jason jogged down the stairs, a feeling of contentment having settled over him. He couldn't be more in love with the little boy snoozing away upstairs. Going through his nightly ritual had meant more to Jason than he could have imagined.

"He's out like a light-." Jason started but stopped when he realized Sam had fallen asleep on the couch. Finally able to let himself just look at her without worrying about making her uncomfortable, Jason strolled over slowly. With a tender smile, he pulled the throw off the back of the couch and draped it over her body.

He lowered himself onto the coffee table and just looked at her. Thick lashes rested against her flawless golden skin, full lips slightly open, her small hand cupping her high cheekbones. Her gorgeous face had a few new lines since he'd disappeared, but they only added to her beauty in his eyes. She still took his breath away.

He leaned forward to brush her hair back from her face and was startled when her eyes fluttered open. She smiled sleepily up at him.

"Jason." She whispered. She reached out and pulled him to her.

"My Jason." She whispered dreamily. And then she was pressing her lips to his softly, and Jason was helpless to do anything but respond. Her lips, warm and soft against his, molded to his, caressing him softly. But it was all too brief, as she was falling back into sleep, a small smile on her face.

Jason stared at her, his heart racing. Desire pounded through him, but more than that, happiness. He knew she hadn't known what she was doing. She was exhausted and half asleep when she'd kissed him. But it gave him hope.

"Goodnight, Sam." He whispered, standing up and after a last glance, he walked silently out the door, closing it with barely a sound.

On the couch, Sam's eyes opened slowly, her fingertips coming up to touch her mouth.

* * *

Sam was walking down the stairs after having tucked Scout in for the night when she heard a knock at the door. She opened the door and smiled when she saw Jason standing there, a sleeping Danny in his arms. He sent her a gentle smile, and lowered his voice so he wouldn't wake Danny.

"Hey, Sam. Sorry, I know I'm a little late dropping him off. He was having so much fun playing with his cousins at Leo's birthday party, I didn't want to tear him away."

Sam's smile widened as she looked tenderly at their son.

"It's fine, Jason. He's your son too. I wasn't worried. I know he's safe with you."

Jason smiled in appreciation, and though he wanted to linger and spend time with Sam, he didn't want to push her. With another small smile, he turned to carry Danny up the stairs and tuck him into bed. When he turned, Sam was leaning against the door frame watching them.

He shot her a questioning look and she straightened up, gesturing for him to follow her. With a last kiss against Danny's forehead, Jason made his way out of the room and followed Sam downstairs.

She gave him a sheepish smile and shrugged.

"I just love seeing you two together. I dreamed of it for so long, but it's better than I could have imagined." She reached out and grabbed his hand and squeezed. Squeezing back, Jason had to swallow past the sudden lump of emotions in his throat.

"Me too. Every day that I can remember of the last five years, all my thoughts were focused on getting back to him. Back to you."

He smiled sadly, and she couldn't deny the grief that poured through her. She'd missed those smiles so much while he'd been gone. She'd missed so much in five years. Suddenly, she found herself burning with the need to know what he'd gone through in those missing five years. She'd wanted to ask him about that time since the moment he'd reappeared, but she had forced herself not to. But if she was going to figure out who and what she wanted, she needed to ask the questions. It had been a couple of weeks since the night she had woken from a dream and kissed him. She'd been avoiding spending time alone with him since then, but no more.

With another squeeze, Jason reluctantly turned to leave but Sam held onto his hand. He looked at her questioningly.

"Jason? Can you stay? I-I want to know about that time, about what you remember of the last five years."

Jason looked at her in surprise. She hadn't asked him about that time since he'd returned, and he had to admit, it had hurt him. But he could see in her eyes how much she wanted to know.

He nodded. "Sure".

They moved to the couch, and Sam suddenly realized she was still holding his hand. She paused for a moment, looking down at their joined hands, but didn't let go. Jason noticed where her gaze had dropped, and bit back a smile when she kept holding on.

"What do you want to know?" He asked.

"Everything. The last thing you remember, the first thing you remember, and everything since."

"That's all?" He teased.

She shrugged with a smile and gestured for him to go on.

"Okay." He cleared his throat. "I remember pain. It felt like it was burning through my back where I was shot. I remember trying to drag myself to safety, but I was too weak from the blood loss already, and I couldn't get very far. And then I felt myself being kicked into the water. It was so cold and dark. And then nothing until I woke up in the clinic in Russia. I'm not sure exactly how long I was unconscious or when I woke up. But when I did, I couldn't move, I couldn't speak. It was like being trapped in my own body, suffocating. It was hell." He paused, closing his eyes briefly against the memories. It had been like his worst nightmare come to life.

When he opened his eyes, he saw Sam look away quickly, in an attempt to hide the tears slipping silently down her face. He reached out to wipe her tears away but stopped, his hand hanging in the air a moment, before he let it drop to his side.

"Sam, don't -". He started, but she shook her head.

"Jason, I'm so sorry. Being stuck in your own body? That would have been like a living nightmare for you." She whispered, trying and failing to control her tears.

Jason marveled at how well she still knew him, his love for her swelling inside him.

"Yeah, it was. But I was alert, you know? And my first thought was about you, and Danny. I knew something was wrong, that I was still in danger because you weren't there. And I knew if I had been hurt and in a hospital, you would have walked across glass to get to me and be by my side."

Sam jolted and looked up. Jason noticed and paused.

"What is it?"

She shook her head.

"Nothing. It's just that, when I thought you were dead, I said something similar. That if you were alive you would walk across glass to get back to me and Danny."

"Nothing could stop me. Nothing did. They rehabbed me, but kept me under a sedative so I couldn't fight. It took a long time, but I finally fought against its effects, and somehow built a resistance to it. I met a woman in the clinic who was there to have surgery on her face, and she helped me escape. I met a visiting man who helped me hide, and then this priest helped me escape. He gave me clothes and shoes, and a way to stowaway on a ship headed to the States. I headed straight here when I got back, but you weren't here. Then I saw you, but before I could show myself, Drew arrived. I didn't know who he was, only that you looked happy. So I left and went to find Sonny, tell him who I was. And you know the rest."

"You would have left if you hadn't found out that Drew thought he was you, wouldn't you?" She wasn't angry per se, but the thought of him making that sacrifice frustrated her.

He nodded.

"If it meant you could be happy, yeah."

"That wouldn't have made me happy." She replied quietly.

He nodded.

"I ran into the woman who helped me in Russia, and she helped me figure out that Drew thought he was me."

"That woman was my aunt, Ava Jerome, and the man who helped you in Russia was Griffin Munroe, her friend, I think." Sam added softly, having gotten this part of the story from Ava herself.

Jason nodded.

"Your family's grown since I was here last." He added with a smile.

Sam grimaced.

"Yeah, it has. My father is the infamous mobster, Julian Jerome. My aunt is Ava Jerome. But I got Lucas as a brother, and that pretty much makes up for the rest."

Jason grinned.

"Now you and Carly share a brother. And somehow became best friends?"

Sam laughed.

"Yeah. After you died, we became close."

"Tell me."

She looked up at him questioningly.

"You know about my time away from you. But I want to know what your life was like while I was gone. Before I came back. Before-before you thought Drew was me." He struggled with those words.

Sam winced, but nodded.

"When Sonny came to tell me you were shot and had fallen into the harbor, I refused to believe him. I went down to the harbor myself and dove for hours looking for you. I couldn't believe that you were really gone. Finally, I had to accept it. And a little while after you disappeared, Steve Webber came and told me that he'd found out his mother had changed the results to torture me some more. Danny really was your son. I was so happy, so relieved. It was like a piece of you was returned to me."

"I already loved him, he was already my son when I was shot. But when you told me in the hospital that he was mine, I can't explain how happy I was. Or how sad. It just reminded me that I had missed five years of my son's life."

"It wasn't your fault. And you're making up for it now." She reminded him.

He nodded. "Yeah, I know. Tell me more."

She hesitated.

"Almost a year after you disappeared, Danny got really sick. Leukemia"

Jason looked up quickly, shock and fear spreading over his face. Sam swallowed, as this was still really hard to speak about.

"He's okay now." She reassured him quickly, before continuing, "Jason, I have never been more scared in my life than when the doctor confirmed it. He got so sick, and he needed a bone marrow transplant but there were no matches. I thought I was going to lose our son and I couldn't bear the thought of it. But then Julian showed up. He was going by Derek Wells then, and no one knew who he really was. But he was a match, and he saved Danny. I'm so mad at him right now, but I'll never be able to thank him enough for saving our little boy." She looked up and was shocked to see Jason's eyes swimming with tears, and the telltale wet tracks of the tears that had already escaped. His gaze went to the stairs.

She reached out and cupped his cheek, wiping his tears away.

"He's okay, Jason. I promise. Four years into remission, and perfectly healthy. No other health scares or anything since then."

Jason stared at her.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that without me." He whispered, leaning into her hand.

She shook her head.

"It wasn't your fault."

Jason took a moment, his eyes going to the stairs again. Sam smiled softly and pushed his shoulder gently.

"Go. You'll feel better after you hold him."

With a grateful look, Jason jumped up and bounded up the stairs, needing to see and feel his little boy safe in his arms.

Sam watched him, knowing the feeling. She took the time alone to try to sort through her feelings. Hearing what he'd gone through, how hard he'd fought to get back to her and Danny had been harder than she'd expected. Telling him what her life had been like had been just as hard. She wasn't sure how to tell him about Silas, or Patrick. But she didn't want secrets between them, and it's not like she'd done anything to feel guilty about. Her thoughts drifted to Drew, and she shifted uneasily.

Jason came back a few minutes later. He sat beside her.

"Thanks for that."

Sam nodded. "Of course."

"Can you-can you tell me the rest?" He asked.

"There's not much too tell. I started a relationship with Danny's oncologist, but his ex-wife was Nina, and she was ten kinds of crazy. She's only like four now." She joked. "But then I fell in love with Patrick Drake. We were actually engaged to be married." She stopped when Jason burst out laughing. Glaring at him, she crossed her arms over her chest.

"What's so funny?"

Jason continued laughing, before finally gaining control over himself.

"Sorry, it's just...I always hated him. He used to stare at you too long when you would walk into the room, and it made me want to shoot him. But he was a good guy, a good father. Never thought you'd fall for his charms, though." He added with a grin.

Sam shook her head, smiling.

"He was amazing. We bonded because we had both lost the loves of our lives in a terrible way and were raising our children alone. He became my best friend. And then more. When I thought you had died, I didn't think I could love again. Patrick proved me wrong. It was hard to let you go, but I knew I had to. For a while anyway." She shrugged.

He'd thought it would hurt him to hear her talk about loving other people while he was gone, and he'd been right. It did hurt, but he was surprised to find he also felt grateful to Patrick. He was glad Sam hadn't been alone.

"What happened? Why didn't you get married?"

"Because of you." She said simply. He shook his head, confused.

"I found out that my friend, Jake Doe, was really my husband, Jason Morgan. I'd never suspected it, never felt any hint of our old connection, so I didn't believe it at first. But Spinelli had a facial recognition program, and Carly had your DNA run. It all seemed to prove that Jake was you. And it changed everything. I loved Patrick, but there was no one in this world I would ever love more than Jason Morgan." She said quietly.

Jason stared at her, eyes burning with love and longing. Her words were like a balm to his soul. She hadn't fallen in love with Drew until she'd believed he was Jason Morgan. Somehow, it eased the pain of the situation a bit knowing that she'd thought she was reuniting with _him._

"And you know the rest. I reunited with the man I thought was you, and we remarried, had Scout. We were really happy, Jason." She sighed and stood up, walking to the fireplace.

"But now everything is confused. I love Drew, but I have to figure out how much of that love is wrapped up in my love for who I thought he was, for you, and how much of that was the real him. You two are so different in some ways, and similar in others."

She stopped, realizing this would hurt him and looked up to apologize. She was surprised to see him smiling at her.

"It's ok, I understand, Sam. I'm glad you and Danny had people in your life to love you. And I know you need time to sort everything out. I'm just glad we got to talk. Knowing what your life was like while I was gone makes me feel like I was a part of it, somehow."

Sam walked towards him and dropping down beside him, reached out to grab his hand, looking at him intently, needing him to understand.

"Because you were, Jason. You were a part of me, and I carried you with me everyday that you were gone. You're still a part of me. Always."

Overcome, Jason pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly. They sat like that for a long time, holding each other, breathing each other in, reveling in their shared touch.

Scout cried from upstairs and Sam reluctantly pulled away. She and Jason stared at each other for a moment, before she stood.

"I better go get her."

He nodded, standing.

"I'll take off. See you, Sam."

Sam watched him go, pressing a hand against her pounding heart. She stood like that for a moment before turning to go to her daughter, her thoughts filled with Jason.

* * *

"Knock knock."

Sam looked up and smiled to see Drew standing in the doorway of her office, Scout in his arms.

"What a nice surprise." She stood and held her arms out for Scout, who was already eagerly reaching out for her mama. "Hey, pretty girl." Sam cooed, grinning up at Drew as Scout gurgled happily.

Drew breathed in deeply, finding solace in this family moment. It had been a few months since the reveal about Jason. Since then, Sam had lived in the penthouse alone with the kids. Drew still saw Scout all the time, but he missed Danny. Drew saw him every week, but lately he was spending more and more time shuffling between Sam & Jason. The two had already built a bond that made Drew's heart ache. It was bittersweet because he was happy for Danny, but it was devastating for him.

Drew shook off the melancholy mood and smiled at Sam.

"I hope you don't mind me stopping by. It's a beautiful day outside, and I was hoping to spend it with my two favorite girls and hopefully, my boy."

Sam glanced at him, her smile dimming a bit. She missed him. Desperately at times. But her heart was no less confused than it had been that day in the office.

"Drew." She said uncomfortably.

"He's with Jason." It wasn't a question. He knew the answer from the guilt in her eyes.

Drew sighed, swallowing back his frustration. He shook off his disappointment and offered up a weak smile.

"That's okay. Maybe next time. But you can still join Scout and I, right?"

Sam bit her lip, unsure.

"It's just a picnic in the park, Sam. I'm not asking you to renew our vows."

Sam held his gaze, tempted.

"I don't know if that's a good idea."

Drew stepped closer, grabbing her free hand and linking fingers. He leaned in, so they were eye to eye.

"I miss you, Sam. Every day. I can't sleep at night, because I miss how your body used to feel wrapped up against mine. I see something funny and I turn to laugh with you but you're not there. I pick up the phone half a dozen times a day to call you to tell you I love you before I remember that I can't do that anymore. Don't you miss me? And our family?"

Sam's eyes swam with tears. She nodded, leaning forward, resting her forehead against his.

"So then let's go. Just for today, let's forget about all of our problems. Let's go have a picnic with our little girl and pretend that life never ripped the ground from underneath us. One afternoon, Sam. That's all I'm asking. I need something to hold on to. Something to let me know that we still have a chance."

Sam was helpless to deny him, especially when it was something she wanted so much herself. The comfort and stability her life with him had provided her.

"Okay." She whispered. She knew she'd made the right decision when Drew's eyes lit up and he beamed down at her.

"You hear that, Princess? Mommy's gonna have a picnic with us." Drew told Scout happily, tickling her and making her laugh.

Grabbing Sam's hand, Drew pulled her along. He ignored the stab of pain in his heart as he realized she wasn't wearing her wedding ring anymore.

"Thanks for letting me see him." Jason said politely, eager to escape.

Elizabeth stared at him for a moment, before nodding slowly.

"Of course. He's your son, too." She seemed to hesitate.

"Jason? About Franco and I. We're getting married in a month. It would mean so much to me, and to Jake, if you could just find a way to move on and make peace with Franco."

Jason stared at her incredulously.

"You're serious?"

Elizabeth sighed in exasperation.

"Yes, Jason. I'm serious. This antagonism and hostility you have for Franco isn't healthy. Jake loves him."

"Jake doesn't know what he did."

"And he never needs to." She said sharply. "Franco wasn't responsible for his actions and there's no need to dredge up his past. Jake is too young to understand and by the time he's older, Franco will have been in his life longer than you have."

Jason stared at her coldly, unable to believe this was the same woman he had loved so many years ago.

"What happened to you?" He asked softly.

Elizabeth stiffened at the pity she heard in his voice.

"I found a love that's stronger and more real than any I've ever known before. I found my soulmate."

"Your soulmate is a rapist."

Elizabeth flinched and squared her shoulders.

"Franco's never raped anyone."

"He made Sam think he'd raped her. For years. He arranged for Michael to be raped in prison. He kidnapped your son. He kidnapped Sam, and Carly, and Lulu. He's a serial killer."

"And you're not?"

Jason shook his head, disgusted.

"Look, I don't care who you let into your bed. I never have. My only concern is for Jake. I'll be watching Franco. If he hurts my son, he'll pay. And so will you."

"Don't threaten me." Elizabeth said coldly. "You're not the end all and be all of my world anymore."

"I don't care." He said dismissively. "Tell Jake I'll see him Sunday."

He left without another word, leaving a seething Elizabeth glaring after him.

Jason strolled outside and approached his truck, smiling at the person waiting inside for him.

"Thanks for waiting with Danny. I don't want him in that house if at all possible."

Molly beamed at him from the backseat of his SUV.

"Of course. I completely agree with you. Besides, you did me a favor. I got to spend some time with my favorite nephew and I got to pick your brain about the effects of brain damage on legal cases for my report."

Jason smiled indulgently and started the car. He dropped Molly off at Kelly's and turned to look at Danny.

"Alright, Son. Where to next?"

Danny grinned at his dad.

"Let's go to the park, Daddy!"

Jason smiled at the center of his world, wishing Jake was with them too.

"You got it, buddy."

Sam laughed and clapped when Scout rolled over on the blanket Drew had spread out on the grass. Drew stared in amazement, pointing at her.

"When did she start doing that?" He asked incredulously.

Sam laughed again.

"A couple of weeks ago. She's also scooting around on her belly a bit too." Sam confided with a wide smile.

"I'm missing things." Drew said quietly, looking at Sam accusatorily.

Sam looked at him apologetically.

"Drew, I'm sorry. I try to make Scout available to you anytime you want to see her."

"I should be there, in our home, with our family."

Sam didn't know what to say. She knew none of this was fair to him but she also knew this was too important to rush into. She couldn't go back to a life with Jason, or move forward with Drew unless she was absolutely sure where her heart lay.

"You don't know anything about your past. What if there's someone out there, missing you, mourning you? What if you have children? Don't you care?" She asked quietly.

Drew hesitated.

"Of course, I do. That's why Curtis and I have been looking into my past." He admitted, waiting to see her reaction.

Sam's eyes flew up to his in surprise.

"What? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want to hurt you or make you think that I didn't want the life I have now because I do. I want our family back more than anything in this world. But I can't walk around with my brother's memories in my head. I don't want his life. I want mine."

Sam looked away, hurt. Drew saw it and reached out to grab her hand.

"The life he had when he fell into that harbor? He deserves to have it back. But the life I've built with you the past three years? That's mine. That's _ours._ And I know in my heart that no matter what I find in my past, I will never find a love greater than the one I found with you. You're the love of my life, Sam. I know it."

Moved, Sam reached out and cupped his face.

"But what if I'm not? What if-." Her words were cut off by Drew's mouth crushing against hers. Sam stiffened, but Drew drew her closer, until she was kissing him back, helpless against the overwhelming love she felt him pouring into it. And still, for the first time ever, it no longer felt right kissing him. She placed her hand on his chest and gently started to push him back.

"Mommy!"

Sam and Drew broke apart at the sound of Danny's voice as the little boy hurtled across the grass towards them. Sam's heart lurched as her gaze was drawn past him to where Jason stood, frozen. For the first time in her recollection, his emotions were written all over his pale, strained face. Devastation, pain, and worse, hopelessness.

"Uncle Drew!" Danny hollered excitedly, throwing himself into Drew's open arms. Pain lanced through Drew as Danny's greeting penetrated his mind. When did Danny stop thinking of him as his father? He sent a questioning gaze towards Sam but her eyes were locked in the distance, guilt and regret etched on her face. He ignored the pain that caused and followed her gaze to Jason.

The look on his brother's face sent a small wave of guilt through him. After all, Jason was as much a victim in all of this as he was himself. But Drew couldn't afford to look at him that way. After all, they were both fighting for their lives, he thought, with a glance at Sam.

Taking a deep breath, Jason schooled his features and approached Sam and Drew. Scout in her arms, Sam stood quickly.

"Jason-." She started to explain but stopped. Nothing she could say would help. It would only hurt one or both men and that was the last thing she wanted. Scout looked up and spotted Jason, and a wide smile split her face and she began squirming, reaching out for Jason.

Jason grinned and scooped Scout into his arms without thinking about it. She gurgled happily, laying her head on his shoulder and Sam smiled at how in love her little girl had fallen with Jason. He always did have a way with kids.

Drew stared at Scout and Jason in surprise and not a little displeasure.

"She's not usually so comfortable with strangers." He said with a cold look at Jason. Jason just met his eyes steadily, remaining silent. He didn't want to say anything to cause tension between Sam and Drew.

Danny laughed and jumped in place.

"Uncle Drew! My daddy isn't a stranger! He comes over and sees me and Scout all the time." Danny shares, laughing at his uncle's silly mistake. He missed the look of alarm on his mom's face. But he didn't miss the look of anger on his uncle's face.

"Did I say something wrong?" His voice trembling, on the brink of tears at the thought of his uncle mad at him.

Drew glanced down at Danny, wanting to reassure him that it wasn't him he was mad at, but couldn't trust himself to speak.

Grimacing, Sam squatted beside her son, while Jason shot Drew a fulminating glare for upsetting Danny.

"Of course not, baby. Look, why don't you and your dad go enjoy the rest of the day and I'll see you when he drops you off at the house." She gave Danny a loud kiss on the cheek and he laughed, his sadness forgotten. Sam looked up and sent a pleading look to Jason. He looked like he was going to argue, glancing at Drew. He didn't want to leave her to face this by herself.

"Please, Jason." She whispered. Closing his eyes briefly, Jason nodded.

"Come on, buddy. Let's go meet your grandma for lunch." He leaned over and handed Scout to Sam and started to walk away. He stopped beside Drew, shooting him a warning glance.

"Don't say anything you'll regret." Drew recognized it for what it was. A warning. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself.

Waiting until Jason was out of earshot, he turned to glare at Sam with barely restrained anger.

"I don't care who you choose in the end, but Scout is MY daughter. Jason will never be her father." He said through gritted teeth.

Sam reared back in surprise. How could he think she would want that?

"I know Scout is your daughter. Jason would never try to take your place. She's his niece and my daughter. And it's not like that."

"Oh yeah? Tell me what it's like then. Does he spend time with her when he comes over to see you? When you're laying in bed together, do you-"

"Don't. Don't finish that sentence." Sam cut him off, pushed past her limits.

"You know me better than that. I would never do that. Scout is our daughter, and I would never let anyone take your place. But Jason is Danny's father, and no matter what happens, he will always be a part of my life. He comes over to see Danny and has seen Scout. That's it."

Drew let out a deep breath, trying to calm himself. He knew he had gone too far. And Sam was right. He did know her better than that. He was furious with himself for letting his jealousy make him react this way.

"Sam, I'm sorry-." He started to reach out but she pulled back, cutting him off again.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I agreed to this picnic. It was clearly a mistake." She pressed a kiss to Scout's cheek and gently laid her down in her stroller.

"Text me when you're on your way with her." She started to walk past but Drew reached out, stopping her.

"Sam, don't leave. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-."

But once again, Sam cut him off, shaking free.

"No, you shouldn't have."

Drew closed his eyes in disappointment as Sam walked away, their picnic forgotten on the ground.

* * *

The picnic with Drew had been a week ago, and things had settled a bit. Jason had kept his distance, picking up Danny only when he was at Monica's. Sam knew she had hurt him and as much as she wanted to explain things, she knew time and distance was what they both needed right now.

She sat in her office, staring blankly at the background checks she'd been running on the computer, replaying the scene in the park in her head.

When Drew had accused her of bringing Jason around Scout, trying to replace him in her life, she had been swamped with guilt. Not because it was true but because she hated causing him pain. But coupled with that guilt had been annoyance. She hated feeling like she had to explain herself all the time. And somewhere along the way, she'd started to feel like she was always trying to justify her actions to Drew. And it wasn't because of anything he had said to her or done to her. When she had still believed him to be Jason, she had recognized a difference in him. She had felt a connection to him, but it hadn't been the same as it had been before his supposed death. And so little by little, she had begun to try to fit this mold of who she thought he wanted her to be now. And doing so, had lost herself.

Finally realizing that had made her slightly resentful towards Drew. Logically, she knew it wasn't his fault. He had never asked her to be anyone other than who she was. But she hadn't felt good enough for him anymore and trying to become someone she wasn't had been suffocating her, little by little. These last months of solitude had made her see her life with clearer eyes. She had missed him and the life they had built together. But she was slowly starting to see that it while it had felt real, it was based on the lie that he was Jason. She had thought she was reuniting with her husband, building a life with her husband. And while it didn't make her love for Drew any less real, it had made it...less. And last week's confrontation with Drew had only made that more evident.

But when she'd seen Jason standing there, hurting after seeing her kiss Drew, it had been more than guilt suffusing her. It had been an awful feeling of burning regret and paralyzing fear. Regret for hurting him and fear that it would make him give up on her. Because that was the last thing she wanted.

Sam shifted in her seat, putting her feet up on the desk and rubbing her hands over her face. What was she doing? Why was she still questioning herself? The longer she waited to make a decision, the worse everyone would be hurt. She had wanted to be sure she was making the right decision, but her heart already knew which direction it wanted to go in.

The truth was that Jason had come back to town and blown her life apart. Not because he was alive because she would thank God every night for that miracle. What had blown her life apart had been the realization that the connection was still there, easy and right. And it made her realize that she had begun to question her connection with Drew, before he had been revealed to _be_ Drew.

She'd asked herself how she could have lived in town with her own husband for nearly a year, and never once felt that connection, never once felt the pull of that invisible, non-severable cord that seemed to tie her to Jason. Sure, she had felt drawn to him. But could it have been simply because he was Jason's twin? She couldn't deny that although there was an attraction between them, she had been deeply in love with Patrick, and only with the reveal that Jake Doe was really Jason Morgan had she even been tempted to pursue something romantic. And so over the last couple years, while she had been deliriously happy, in her most private thoughts, she had wondered what happened to the connection they had shared. Had the years apart severed the tie between them, she'd wondered.

Until Jason pulled her out of the pier that night and suddenly the tether that tied her heart to Jason's had never felt stronger. And she had known, the second their eyes had met, that she was looking at her husband. Her soulmate.

He had returned to her, the calm in the storm of her life, never making demands or asking for more than she could give him. Always patient, always waiting. He made her feel safe and yet so alive that it felt like her nerves were tingling whenever they were together.

And that was the problem. That realization had sent her spiraling towards Drew, desperate to deny Jason's existence because the thought that she had mistakenly believed someone else was Jason had stolen her breath under the crushing weight of guilt. The last few months had helped her make peace with that, mostly because her heart had so instantly recognized Jason that it made it clear the connection with him was the realest thing she'd ever felt.

Sam smiled softly, her hand going to the necklace hidden beneath her t-shirt. Hanging from the chain was the lug nut that Jason had given her all those years ago. She'd put it on spontaneously a week ago and had told herself it didn't mean anything; it was just nostalgia. But she'd been lying to herself. She'd known for a while who she belonged with. Now it was time to tell him. But there was something she had to do first.

Sitting behind his desk at Aurora Media, Drew stared at the flashdrive in his hand, turning it over and over again in his palm. Curtis and Anna Devane had found the key to getting his memories back just last night.

He'd stayed up all night, wondering if he wanted to go through with this procedure. What if he got his memories back but lost the last three years with Sam. Would he forget his daughter? Would he still love Sam? Was it worth the risk? But what if he didn't have the procedure? Could he really keep living with another man's memories in his head? Especially when so many of those memories are of that man with the woman Drew loved more than life.

A knock at the door had his head lifting, an easy smile spreading across his face at the sight of Sam. He closed his hand quickly and stood, slipping the flash drive into his pocket. He wasn't sure why he'd hid it from her. It had been instinctive. But he was going to tell her. Of course he was going to tell her; right now, in fact.

"Hey. I'm glad you stopped by. I have something to talk to you about." He greeted her, leaning down and pressing a kiss on her cheek. She closed her eyes briefly when he did and when she opened them, the sorrow in her eyes made his stomach clench. Instinctively, he braced himself for what was coming.

"Me too." Her voice was soft, almost a whisper and that feeling of dread in his stomach grew.

"You first." He nodded, stepping back and leaning against his desk, crossing his arms over his chest in a defensive stance.

"Drew…" Her voice trailed off and he watched as her eyes filled with tears and she blinked them back furiously. And he knew.

"You're choosing him." His voice was emotionless. She met his eyes and nodded miserably.

"Drew, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Sam held her hands clasped in front of her, needing him to see how hard this was for her.

"Tell me why."

She couldn't lie to him. She wouldn't.

"I love him." She said simply.

The words pierced the armor he wore around his heart, and pain leaked out of him like blood from a wound.

"You love me too." He said, his voice breaking a little. He cleared his voice and blinked back the tears that burned his eyes.

Sam nodded.

"I do."

At her confirmation, hope flared and Drew leapt forward, picking up her hands. Bringing them to his lips, he kissed them.

"Then choose me. You love me too."

Sam shook her head, pulling her hands free gently. She took a step back, needing him to hear her.

"Not the way I love him."

Drew winced and shook his head.

"I don't believe you. You're just confused. More than anyone, I understand because I know firsthand how much you loved Jason. But these past years have been ours. And you loved me just as much. No, more!"

Sam shook her head again.

"I'm not confused, Drew. In fact, I see everything clearer now. Yes, I loved you. I do love you and I always will. We share a beautiful daughter who was created out of that love. But that love only exists because I thought you were someone you weren't. I wasn't in love with Drew Cain. I was in love with Jason Morgan. That's who I wanted to be with, to remarry, to have another child with."

Drew stared at her stunned, speechless with hurt.

Sam schooled her features not to show how hard this was for her. She was being brutal with her words, knowing it was the only way to make him see the truth. She hated herself for hurting him, but he would only hurt more if he held out hope.

"You'll never convince me that you didn't love me. Yes, you thought I was Jason, but I wasn't the same. I was different in every way that counts and we were happy together. I changed for you. I gave you the life you deserved and put you first in a way that Jason never did. I'm better for you."

Sam shook her head slowly.

"Maybe you are. But it doesn't change anything. Jason and I, we share the kind of love that defies reason. It's a love that just is. I was happy with you, Drew. I won't ever deny that. But I was also trapped in this life that I never wanted, one that never really fit me. I was suffocating, Drew, and you never even noticed. But Jason, within one conversation with me, he knew that I was lost. When you were begging me to reassure you and promise to stay with you, Jason was reassuring _me_ , and asking for nothing in return."

Drew stared at Sam, unable to believe what he was hearing. It was like she was someone he didn't know. He locked his legs against the weakness he felt, the ground suddenly unsteady beneath him.

"After everything we've been through, after all the times we made love, all the promises we made to each other, you're telling me you felt trapped?" His voice was hoarse, straining around the lump of emotion in his throat. He rubbed his chest in an absent-minded gesture to relieve the agonizing pain there.

Sam couldn't do this. She moved forward and grabbed his hands, holding them against her heart.

"Drew, no. You made me feel loved and cherished and we were happy. I was happy. But the life you wanted for us was never the life I envisioned for myself. When we met, I had already changed my life so much to fit into Patrick's. That's who I was when you met me, when we fell in love. But it was never really me. But I thought that's what you wanted, that you couldn't love me if I was the real me and so I convinced myself that I could be happy being that version of myself."

Drew dropped his head against hers, beginning to understand, though it hurt no less.

"So you're saying I don't know the real you, that I'm in love with the version of yourself you thought I wanted?"

Sam nodded. She reached up and cupped his face.

"This is not your fault, Drew. It's mine. I've lied to you and to myself and everyone else long enough. I need to be who I am again. And who I am is someone who has always and will always be in love with Jason Morgan. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Drew pulled Sam into a crushing embrace, burying his face in her neck, as tears silently slipped down his face.

"I don't know how to stop loving you, Sam. You say you love me, but not the way you love Jason. But I'm only capable of loving you."

Sam held Drew, hurting desperately for him. She did love him. But there was not a single doubt in her mind that Jason was the love of her life and that she wanted to be with him. She couldn't deny her feelings anymore.

Finally, she pulled away.

"Don't go. Please." He whispered hoarsely.

Sam closed her eyes against the audible pain in his words.

"It's better if I go. I'm sorry, Drew." She hesitated before continuing, "You'll always be a part of my life because we share a beautiful daughter together. And I'll never keep you away from her. You know that, right?"

Drew cleared his throat and rubbed his hands over his face.

"Of course."

She paused again, not sure if what she wanted to say next would help or hurt him. But she couldn't leave it unspoken.

"Thank you, Drew. For giving me a beautiful life with our children, a life that I never expected, one that was better than I could have ever imagined. You saved me in more ways than one and I'll always love you for that."

Drew's eyes drifted closed against the fresh wave of heartbreak her words caused.

"Don't thank me. Being with you, building the life we shared with our kids? It was the best part of my life. It was everything. I'm going to love you forever, Sam." He never opened his eyes, clenching his jaw against the urge to beg her to stay.

"Bye." She said softly, swiping away at the tears sliding down her face. She started backing away a few steps before remembering that he had wanted to speak to her too when she'd arrived.

"Wait, Drew. What did you want to talk about when I got here?"

His hand slipped into his pocket, his hand closing over the flash drive.

"It doesn't matter anymore." He cleared his throat again. "Look, I've got a meeting coming up in a bit."

Understanding he wanted to be alone, Sam nodded sadly.

"Of course. I'll see you around."

"Yeah."

And with a last look, Sam turned around and walked away from the life she'd spent the last three years building and towards the man her heart had been yearning for since he'd returned to town.

Drew watched her until the door closed behind her. And with a roar of anguish, he spun around and swept everything off his desk. It wasn't enough to ease the crushing pain inside him and he turned looking for another target. He started to pull his other hand from his pocket when he felt the flash drive again and felt a blanket of calm settle over him.

He didn't have to feel like this anymore. He knew exactly how he could get rid of the pain of Sam choosing Jason over him. Bouncing the flash drive in his palm, he bent over and picked up the office phone, setting it on the desk. He pressed the intercom button.

"Rachel, can you get Dr. Andre Maddox on the line, please?"

* * *

After leaving Drew, Sam went straight to pick up the kids and home to pack. She couldn't stay here anymore. It had been her home with both Jason and Drew, and she couldn't imagine trying to build a life with Jason here again. She didn't want him to feel like he was fighting the ghosts of her and Drew's past here.

And although she was completely sure of her choice, she needed to be alone for a little while before jumping back into anything with Jason.

After a quiet night with the kids, she reached out for her phone and started to text both Jason and Drew.

 _I need some time alone. I'd like to leave town for a few days and I'd like to take the kids with me, if you're okay with that._

She waited calmly for the replies, knowing both men would have no objection.

Jason replied first.

 _You don't have to ask. I know Danny's safe with you. I'm here if you need me._

Drew replied shortly after.

 _That's fine. Whatever you need._

And a moment later.

 _Is Jason going with you?_

Sam sighed, searching for patience, knowing he was hurting because of her.

 _No. I told you, I just need time to myself with the kids._

When a response didn't come, she set her phone down and finished packing.

The next two weeks passed in blissful peace, spending time with her kids on the beaches of Hawaii. It was the first time she had been back since her honeymoon with Jason, and Sam had finally decided it was time to take back her good memories of this place. It hadn't been easy, but it was something she'd had to do, and do alone. She was glad she had. She was already looking forward to spending vacations here with Jason too.

That thought sent a smile flirting on the corner of Sam's lips. She had to admit, she felt a sense of calm now that she had finally admitted to herself what she'd always known: Jason was her soulmate and the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. Taking these last two weeks to come to peace with the end of one chapter of her life, and the promise of the new life she would share with Jason had left her feeling secure in her decision, but also in who she was. She had been happy with Drew, but the sense of fulfillment and self-awareness she now felt couldn't be denied.

They'd be home in Port Charles later this afternoon, and Sam was hoping that she would be in Jason's arms by the end of the night. It was time to tell him that she wanted a life with him.

Sam thanked the doorman who had helped her bring up her luggage, while she carried a napping Scout into the suite of rooms Carly had given them at the Metro Court. Exhausted from traveling, Danny stumbled into the living area like a zombie and dropped straight onto the sofa and into a nap. With a laugh, Sam set Scout in her crib, and carried Danny to the room he would be staying in and laid him in his bed, where she gently removed his sneakers and covered him. Exhausted herself, Sam moved into her bedroom and into the shower, washing off the grime of a day of traveling with two young kids.

Afterwards, Sam began to plan. After a quick call to Molly, she selected her outfit carefully, and set about making this a night neither she nor Jason would forget. By the time the doorbell rang, Sam was ready. She opened the door and grinned when Molly's jaw dropped and then a knowing smile spread over her face.

"You're telling Jason tonight!" Molly crowed, beyond excited for her sister. She hadn't wanted to push, but she'd known all along who Sam would end up with. After all, she'd seen how in love Sam and Jason had been for nearly their entire relationship. There was no denying that kind of love.

Sam laughed and nodded.

"So? How do I look?"

Molly fanned herself and wiggled her eyebrows, making Sam laugh again.

"Give us a spin." Molly drawled teasingly.

Sam did a sassy spin and Molly clapped.

"You look beautiful, Sam. Jason's not going to know what hit him."

Sam let out a breath of relief and hugged her sister.

"Thanks for watching the kids tonight."

"Of course. I'm just so thrilled to see my favorite soulmates find their way back to each other."

Once Molly left with the kids, Sam moved to the mirror to check herself one last time before heading out to surprise Jason.

The strapless nude dress with black lace overlay fit her like a glove, ending just above her knees, showing off her curves to perfection. Her black stilettos gave her some much needed added height and showed off her legs. Her kohl-lined eyes peered back at her through thick sooty lashes, and a satisfied smile curved her wine-tinted lips.

"I hope you're ready, Jason. This will be a night to remember."

The doorbell ringing had her lifting her head in curiosity.

"Who else knows I'm here?" She wondered out loud, hurrying to answer the door.

Swinging the door open, she stopped dead when she saw Jason standing in the hall, looking uncharacteristically anxious.

Jason stood there, unable to speak, or move, or hell, even breathe. Sam was standing there in the sexiest damn dress he'd ever seen. Her skin had a golden glow to it, and he could tell she'd spent the last two weeks on a beach somewhere. She looked well rested and more at peace than she had since he'd returned to town. She took his breath away.

"Jason. Hi." Sam said stupidly. This wasn't going according to plan.

Jason swallowed. Then he swallowed again. Sam started to smirk, and shifted into a slightly more flattering stance. It paid off when Jason's eyes widened and he swallowed again.

"Jason?" She prodded, loving this.

Jason shook his head to clear it, and when he lifted his gaze to meet her laughing eyes, the corner of his mouth twitched up. She was eating this up. He couldn't help it. He grinned at her and shook his head again.

"You look incredible." He said simply.

A slow grin spread over Sam's face.

"Thank you. Come on in." She opened the door wider but didn't move so that Jason had to squeeze past. With a slight smirk, he did just that, his body brushing against her, sending a shiver down her back.

He turned to face her, though his eyes were looking around.

"Looking for something?"

"Danny." He admitted sheepishly.

Sam felt her heart expand with love.

"He's not here. The kids are with Molly tonight."

He looked at her again, an unappealing thought coming to mind.

"I'm sorry. Did I interrupt something? Do you have plans?" The thought that she'd gotten dressed up for Drew was like a knife in his gut.

Sam shook her head slowly.

"I had plans but you're not interrupting. How did you know I was back in town? And staying at the Metro Court?"

The corner of Jason's mouth quirked up in a wry grin and Sam knew the answer to her own question.

"Carly."

"Carly."

They replied simultaneously and then laughed.

"We were talking and I mentioned how much I missed you and Danny and-." Jason stopped, his eyes darting away. Sam couldn't help but smile.

"Danny missed you too. He talked about you the whole time we were gone."

Jason looked up, beaming.

"Yeah?"

Sam nodded.

"Yeah."

Jason hesitated. But he'd come here tonight for a reason and he wasn't going to back down.

"Was he the only one who missed me?" His voice was low and smooth, and Sam felt a tingle all the way down to her toes. She was a bit surprised that Jason was being so bold, considering his "wait until you're ready" stance.

She shook her head slowly. "No. He wasn't."

Suddenly shy, she couldn't make herself say more. She knew who and what she wanted, but it had been so long since her and Jason had been together. She hadn't expected to lose her confidence, but it seemed she had. It had been five long years and her body had changed. She kept herself fit and trim, but time took a toll you couldn't avoid and until this very moment she hadn't considered that Jason might find himself disappointed with the changes.

As Sam wrestled with her sudden insecurities, Jason was watching her, wondering what she was thinking about. The way she bit her lip had his gaze dropping to her full, pouty mouth. Unbidden, his thoughts took him to wild nights spent in bed with her, that gorgeous mouth driving him crazy. He shifted suddenly, trying to control his body's response to those memories. He let his gaze drift over her, fascinated by the way the black lace seemed to show tantalizing hints of flesh, where it clung lovingly to her curves. Sam had always been the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, but in the last five years, she had grown even more beautiful, more intoxicating. She mesmerized him.

"Jason?" She asked hesitantly.

Jason dragged his eyes up to hers and shook his head ruefully.

"Sorry, it's just...you're so beautiful it hurts." He said roughly, his hand coming up to rest on his heart.

Her face lit up, a smile spreading as her confidence suddenly returned.

"Thank you." She murmured. They were still standing near the doorway, so she turned and led him to the sofa in the living area, adding a little extra sway to her hips. Jason watched her walk away, mesmerized by the swing of her hips and the way the dress clung to her ass. Stifling a groan, he followed her.

"Are you sure this is okay? I mean, you said you had plans." He reminded her reluctantly.

She smiled over at him.

"They were with you."

Wide eyed, Jason just blinked.

Sam let out a laugh at Jason's surprised, confused expression, and taking a deep breath, she tossed her hair back.

"I have something I need to tell you. And I need you to let me say it all, without interrupting me, okay?" She met his eyes and studied them until what she saw satisfied her.

Jason just watched her patiently, holding his breath.

Sam took a deep breath and went for it.

"I love you. Jason, I never stopped loving you. Even when we weren't together, or when we were with other people, I loved you." She was babbling now, tears in her eyes. Jason watched her, his own eyes growing wet as he watched the love of his life bare her soul to him. "God, Jason, even when I hated you, I loved you. I've been in love with you for what seems like my entire life."

"Sam." Jason said achingly, reaching for her but she pulled back, shaking her head almost hysterically.

"No, please. I need to get this out. I've loved other men, both while you were alive and when I thought you were dead. And it was real every time. But it was nothing, nothing compared to the love we shared. Jason, you're my soulmate, the other half of my heart, and I am so sorry I made you wait this long. Because the minute I saw you, I knew who you were. Because when you held me, I felt it. Here." She pounded a closed fist against her chest. "And here." Her other hand went to cover her mid section.

"Every instinct I had was screaming that this time it was real. That my husband was back. I felt safe and sure and desperately happy. And that terrified me. Because I'd already gone through this. But it was different, you know? Before, it was like my head knew I had my husband back, knew I still loved him and needed him. When you came back, my head was screaming that Drew was my husband, but my heart only seemed to beat when I was with you. I knew. This isn't making any sense, I'm sorry. I just-."

Jason moved closer, grabbing her hands. He had to swallow once, twice, against the lump in his throat. She was saying everything he'd dreamed of her saying to him, and even though he was a man who rarely felt fear, at this moment, he was terrified. Terrified that one day she would realize she'd made a mistake and she would change her mind.

"Sam, are you sure? We can't do this if you have any doubts about who you love or who you want to be with. Living without you is like a knife in my heart, but having you back only to lose you later? That would kill me." His voice trembled with the force of his emotion, and Sam felt her heart break for him.

This time it was her that closed the distance between them, pushing up to her knees. She cupped his face, staring into his eyes, desperate to make him understand, to believe her.

"Jason, I'm so in love with you. I want to be with you and only you. I have no regrets, no doubts, no hesitations. I'm all in. Are you?"

With a groan, Jason dragged her forward and crushed his mouth against hers. The fire that was always between them burned brighter than ever, leaving them breathless as they pressed their bodies together, desperate to get closer.

Jason pulled back slightly, resting his forehead against hers. "I love you, Samantha Morgan. Forever." Sam blinked against tears, feeling truly whole for the first time in five years. "I love you too, Jason. Forever."

This time, their lips met in a slow, lingering kiss that slowly heated up. The taste of her was like a drug he couldn't get enough of, a part of him, living inside him. Still, he wanted more. And so he took more, crushing his mouth to hers until the heat of it swamped her, leaving her breathless. Hands and mouths turned greedy, reaching and grasping for more. Need pulsed through their bodies like a shot of adrenaline.

When she moved to climb over him, Jason stopped her, cursing himself all the while.

"Wait, wait." He gasped out unsteadily. "Sam, wait. Are you sure? It's not too soon?"

"Not soon enough." She answered quickly, sinking into another kiss with him, moving over him, straddling him.

"Thank God." He muttered against her mouth, his hands sliding down to her hips, pulling her against him. She moaned at the press of his length against her center. She let out a surprised shriek as she was suddenly flipped and found herself on her back on the couch, Jason leaning over her. He smirked and leaned down, their lips moving against each other, tongues tangling. Her heart hammered as his hands explored her body, driving her wild. His muscles tensed as her hands slipped under his shirt and towards his waistband. His hand stopped hers and she groaned with frustration. The corner of his mouth shot up in an amused grin.

"Not here, not here." He stood, pulling her up with him. He led her to the bed and stopped in front of it. His hands slid down her, running over her curves hungrily. She reached for the hem of his t-shirt and yanked on it. He let her go to pull his shirt over his head, tossing it on the floor. His hands came to the zipper in the back of her dress and slowly slid it down, turning her around as he did. Spreading the sides of the dress open, exposing her smooth back, he leaned forward and pressed a hot, open-mouthed kiss against her shoulder. She wasn't wearing a bra and he found he suddenly couldn't breathe.

Chills of desire shivered down her spine, and Sam shimmied slightly, making the dress fall to her waist. Bared from the waist up, she looked over her shoulder and caught her breath at the look of hunger on Jason's face. His arms came around her from behind, reaching up to cup her breasts, the heavy globes overflowing in his big hands. Sam whimpered, moving her hips back against him.

Suddenly, she found the dress torn off her, and she was being lifted and tossed onto the bed. She let out a laugh as Jason kicked off his pants and fell into bed beside her. Leaning over, he studied her body almost worshipfully. He looked up at Sam and his voice was shaking when he spoke.

"You're so beautiful, Sam. You've only gotten more beautiful." He said hoarsely, the need for her damn near strangling him. She smiled up at him, and reaching up, curled her hands into the hair at the nape of his neck, pulling him down for another hot, hungry kiss. They pulled, tugged, and yanked until there were no more barriers between them, their naked bodies pressed together. Their breath mingled as they panted, Sam arching into his wandering, stroking hands.

"Jason." She made small noises that drove him wild, tossing her head back in sheer ecstasy. Her eyes flew open wide and her purr of pleasure turned into a breathy moan as he plunged inside her without warning, filling her to completion. As she stretched to accommodate his size, she clenched around him, making him groan with need. She arched, letting him fill her, meeting him thrust for thrust as he set a furious pace.

It had been so long and he knew he wouldn't last long.

"Sam, I can't hold on. Come for me, baby. Please." He begged, desperate to explode inside her, make her his again. The thrill, the hot and dangerous edge of it sliced through her at his words. She felt alive with purpose and pleasure. She pushed against him, and without argument, he spun so that she was above him, straddling him. He groaned at the sight of her breasts swaying above him, and rearing up, he clamped his mouth around her breast, sucking and lapping at her, driving her crazy. She tightened around him, riding him as if their lives depended on it.

Need and heat roiled up inside of her, her nerves jagged edges of ecstasy. The air thickened, her vision blurring as the orgasm built within her powerful and overwhelming. It rolled over her in waves and waves of pleasure so intense, she couldn't breathe. She screamed his name, shuddering as she collapsed onto him. He gripped her hips and drove himself up into her in fast, furious thrusts, before he was shouting his own release, emptying himself into her. He buried his face into her neck, whispering her name like a prayer.

Out of breath, hearts racing, they held each other, staring into each others eyes, wrapped around each other.

"I didn't think it was possible for us to be even more intense than we used to be." Sam said softly, a pleased smile on her face.

"I'm not surprised. I've always wanted you more the next day than the one before. I don't think that will ever change." He replied tenderly.

A brow arched.

"Oh yeah? Prove it."

Jason smirked, and flipped her over onto her back, sliding back into her.

She gasped in pleasure.

"Already?" She panted, surprised and thrilled.

"Shh. I've got something to prove." He teased, beginning to move. And that's exactly what he did.

Later that night, finally spent and exhausted, Sam sank into a deep sleep, wrapped around Jason's body. Jason held her tightly, looking up at the ceiling. He felt the tears slipping down the side of his face as he began to whisper something over and over, burying his face in Sam's neck.

"Thank you, God. Thank you, God."

* * *

Sam and Jason spent the next day together, laying in bed, talking and making plans for the future. Jason had admitted that he'd begun to think he needed to take on a different role in Sonny's organization. He'd lost five years with Sam and Danny because of his job, and he didn't want to risk that ever happening again. Sam argued that she'd always known who he was, and trusted he could keep both himself and their family safe. But Jason insisted. He couldn't abandon Sonny or Carly, or the family they had given him. But he could take on a less dangerous role and he would. It was time he put his family first, and he knew Sonny would understand. Besides, he could always step in if needed. Sam agreed, insisting only if he was sure but he saw the relief she tried to hide and knew he'd made the right decision.

The next weeks with them were incredible. Days spent with the kids, nights spent in each other's arms. It wasn't long before they decided to make it official and move in together. Both wanted a fresh start, so Sam sold the penthouse, and Jason found them a nice home near the Quartermaine Mansion.

Sam was happier than she'd ever been, and nothing could bring her down. Even things with Drew were better. She'd been furious and terrified to find out that he'd hidden the truth from her about the flash drive, and had undergone the memory mapping surgery with Dr. Maddox without talking to her. But to her great relief, the procedure had been a success.

Drew no longer had Jason's memories, and had been been regaining his own. Losing Jason's memories had changed the way he'd felt about Sam, something she'd viewed with relief, and a small measure of pain. No longer seeing her through the haze of Jason's all-encompassing love, Drew had realized that he had truly loved Sam, but there had been other loves in his life that had been just as powerful, if not more so. With that realization, he'd finally been able to let go, and the sight of Jason and Sam caused him no pain.

In fact, he and Jason had begun to make inroads on a relationship as brothers. It was slow progress, but progress nonetheless. On a more positive note, his memories of his time with Kim had returned, and they'd begun to quietly date, finding themselves slowly sinking into love.

Jason and Sam's family and friends were thrilled when they found out they'd reunited. Of course, Alexis had her qualms, but she couldn't stand against Sam's obvious happiness. Jason took over the running of the coffee importing business, while Sonny focused on the business. He was able to rest easy knowing that if he needed him, Jason would be there for him. The most important thing to him and Carly, was that their best friend was back, and they couldn't be happier.

By the end of the year, Jason and Sam had remarried in a small, intimate wedding attended by their closest friends and loved ones. No one who looked at them could doubt that they were meant to be. Jason and Sam were soulmates, and would always find their way home to each other.

2 Years Later...

Jason led a blindfolded Sam carefully down the gentle slope of the hill. Arriving at his destination , he reached up and removed her blindfold. Sam stared in surprise. There was a picnic set up by the bank of the river, and beside it, a bag of breadcrumbs.

Sam glanced back up at him.

"You told me once you used to imagine coming to the park with me and Lila, and teaching her to feed the ducks. Just the three of us. We didn't get to do that with our little girl, but it's not too late do that with our son or Scout. And this time next year, we can bring our newest addition too." He added and his hands came around her to rest on her burgeoning stomach. Their little boy or girl kicked against his hand as if to say he/she was onboard with the plan.

Tears in her eyes, Sam shook her head, whispering, "You remembered."

"I remember everything about you." He said simply. So in love, it hurt to breathe, Sam turned in Jason's arms and pressed her lips to his.

"Thank you, Jason. This is perfect. You're perfect."

"No, I'm not. I'm just in love with you."

Jason smiled and then as one, they turned at the sound of Danny & Scout's laughter as they chased each other nearby.

"Careful! Don't go near the water!" Jason called out, hurrying forward. Sam settled down on the blanket and laying a hand on her swollen stomach, she watched her husband chase their children around, and smiled in contentment.

She'd never been happier. She knew she'd been happy with Drew, but she had found herself trying desperately to be someone she wasn't. She had been so lost and so confused when Jason had dropped out of the sky and back into her life. It wasn't until she'd stopped and took the time to find herself again, that she'd found her path. And as always, it had led her straight to Jason.

*********The End ********

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